There’s is nothing that 99% of people agree on - everything is a sliding scale. Be yourself. Share things you feel comfortable sharing and give then space to do the same. Periods of silence are ok. They’re probably also nervous and think they’re the not normal one.
ETA- Report back and let us know how it goes.
My husband and I were not married when our kids were born. I wanted to have the same name as my kids So I gave them my maiden name. I never really liked that name and I wasn’t particularly close to my dad, so when my husband and I got married, we all changed our names to his.